-Intellectual Capacity-

Arranged Marriage...Is it still relevant?

Lets talk about a topic where views can be shared by both sex. I personally don't want to put me into a turgid situation where i might appeal to you as a sexist or as the title of my blog suggests, a lunatic.

Well, arranged marriage is one particular where i can't seriously incline myself to a proper stand. Strange as it may sound, but let me put it this way where everyone can understand. Some 3-4 months ago, i was talking to my aunt about marriage. What actually makes marriage last? Why does the marriages of the Eastern community seems to last so long unlike what we see among some Hollywood couple who practices T.F.T( Ashwin,please explain,its too offensive to display in my blog). Is it the lion-like ego of the man of the family who turns out to be the Lord who controls every fractionof happenings in the family. Or maybe it's the opposite sex who remains silent to what the Lord have to do and remain as the scapegoat? Her answer was pretty shocking- Arranged Marriage. If you ask me, i don't personally agree but i can't deny it anyway, taking into account the rate of divorce which seems to grow at a steady rate.

Firstly, let us ponder what actually appeals parents about arranged marriages. Our parents are the closest known human being to us, showering love every time you need them. Resurgence,resurrection,resuscitation,renaissance,revivification are the words best to describe what we might have gone through in our life. Yet, nobody could understand us better than our very own parents. So, when they have done so much in our life ie by giving us education and support, don't tell me they can't actually find someone who would fit our aura. Someone who could cook for you, give you the support like a good father would do and most importantly, thinks like a caring mother who feeds her own blood to her child. Some people who claim to so educated may come up to me and say, Hey you should be an ancient Indian King...dei macha, where on earth can you find someone like this? I don't deny it....but hope is what makes reality,right?Proponents of arranged marriage claim that arranged marriages are more successful than other marriages. They hold that the spouses in an arranged marriage begin without any expectations from each other, and that as the relationship matures, a greater understanding between the two develops, aided by their often similar socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds (Quoting from www.wikipedia.org ,2006)

Of course there's a bad site of arraged marriage. How can you actually be with someone who've never met in your life? Could you spend the rest of your life with that particular person? Or like a brave statement said in movie that i watched recently..." If i marry you, all i'm going to get is the same food, same treatment as your family member and of course, lose my virginity to you whom i've never met up and talked to before?( well,i'm talking about normal people who eats normal food and lead a normal life. So if you think you're some Jolie-Pitt couple, then i don't have words for you) It's quite true that Indians parents are selective when it comes to marriage. All they want is their child to have a nice family and the ability to raise the family just like they did.

With that points said, i've a situation for you. Let's put up a situation where you've become successful in your life and you've always been a fillial son or daughter. Your parents have never refused your views or your needs but they have one responsibility to be completed-To marry off you to a person of their choice. Being a good one, you agreed. A month later, you've met this person who is so bloody compatibale with you-A match made in heaven. But, you have an obligation to your parents who moulded you to what you are today. You tried talking with that person who meet about this and she/he gave you only one optin.What is your stand?

posted by Naveen @ 6:49 pm